2006 Mets Opening Day Demo
2006 Mets Opening Day Demo
Dr. Willie’s Amazing All Star Band Takes Their Solos
Copyright c 2006 Evan Pritchard
For amazine
The Mets opening day performance ran as smoothly as a demo, but it was all live. It was perhaps the tightest band to take a bow at Shea since the Beatles played there on August 23rd, 1966. It went something like this: “Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Shea Hall, where the drinks are cold and the music is hot…we’ve flown in top talent from all over the continent, so sit back and relax and treat yourself to some fine jammin’ with Dr. Willie’s Amazing All Star Band.
“First we have ‘Six-good-innings-and-I’m-outta-here’ Tom Glavine. He’s got rhythm and a lot of hits for a guy with a golden arm. Let’s hear two of them today…and watch that solo base run in the fifth inning. Wow! This guy got game!” Take it away Tom!” pt pt pt pt diddiladop bop tchssssss! Watch him go crazy between the first and second ending. (applause) You may have heard his vocals on “I’ve Seen Fire and I’ve Seen Rain.”
“Over on first base—you might have caught him on MiamiVice last season, is Mr. Carlos Delgado; he’s got style on those assists. Show us a double play! Bop bud da doo da bum bum zweep! (applause) And on second base we got that double play counterpoint from Mr. Anderson HerNANdez. Watch as he makes the play of the game to steal a hit away from the Nationals. What dexterity. Take a bow, Andy…” Bom bom bomba bom bee bu ba boo bop bop. (applause)
“Our lead man of course is the swift-as-the-wind Jose Reyes. He can run but he never walks. Watch him on the relay…. bring it on back home, Reyes!” Can you play, “I Want to Be In A-Mer-ree-ka? Dwee dap bop diddila dwee bop!” (applause) Wow, talk about a fast break! He’s got some fancy footwork!
“Playing cleanup, Mr. Clean himself, David Wright. Hit a solo homer for us, Dave…” dweeee BOP! And look at him go! Ain’t he amazin’?” What’s that, the Third Man Theme? (applause)
“In left field, Mr. “No-Name” Xavier Nady, the man whose better than you think he is. Show us your 4-4-4 groove, baby! Way to go! Its 4-4 time!” Tidili tidily toppalabopala bing bang zjing ptsssssssssss. (applause) He’s batting a thousand.”
“And of course, the man you’ve know for all these years, bone man Carlos Beltran. Watch him do those sliding catches and steals. Get down Carlos. Give us some hot salsa! Hweedee bop doowah bwa bwa bwa dup!” (applause)
“Cliff Floyd in the sixth position, show us your stuff. Badaba bip bop do wah diddy.” (applause) Let’s see that dramatic ending again on the videotape. “And he’s OUT AT SECOND. GAME OVER! METS WIN!”
“And standing in for ourstanding vocalist Mike Piazza is newcomer Paul LoDUCA! Nice bit of acting there Paul. Can you pull rabbits out of hats too? Let’s hear some applause for Mr. Paul Lo DUCA! (applause) He drove in the first run of the season, and gave us a wonderful rendition of “When the Swan Dive Comes To Soriano.”
On Middle Relief is Aaron Heilman. Give us two dramatic intermezzos Aaron! A couple of suspended chords on that geetar…Dweep dweep doowaah,…ddrrmmm ddrmm, and now the tonic, right down the middle. Chucka chucka chuckala boom bam bish!” All right baby! Now sit down!”
“And last but not least, the Big Bouncer, Billy Wagner. Give that guy three straight strikes, one under the chin, one to the chest, and one to the belly! Way to punch him out, Billy!” (applause) And we’re outta here. Let’s hear one more happy recap, guys!”
“There you have it, ladies and gents, Dr. Willie’s Amazing All Stars, for your dining and dancing pleasure. Let’s give them a hand!”
What a well-orchestrated opening day demo! Let’s hope they can keep it up during those long concert tours.
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